"If my car was running like this, I'd give it gas for fear it would stall." That's what I said to my husband last night as I was laying in bed. My heart felt like it was hesitating or fluttering. He suggested that it was anxiety and I bet he is right considering all I have dealt with lately. I haven't had any heart pains - maybe some pains in the a$$, but that is relationship driven and I wouldn't want it any other way. "I love my family!" One other change is that I am back on my exercise program and have been briskly walking for 3-8 miles a day with the maximum of two cheats (days off) a week. My goal is to be running with my brother in a marathon next year and I have 384 days until my my goal date. My goal date is my 50th birthday and I need to beat his 50th birthday time; if only I could manipulate him into returning my phone calls. Did I mention "I love my family!"? If he returns my phone call, I will find out what his marathon time was when he turned 50 years old. (hahahaha! he is afraid to let me know for fear I'll smoke him)
Okay, okay, back to the original subject. I did find some information on line that helped me to relax about my "heart stall". Apparently it's quite normal as long as you don't have chest pains, feel faint or sweaty. Hummm, "Sweaty" now that's a hidden symptom since I have hot flashes regularly. (giggle) Never the less, I think I may be just fine, although I should have researched this before I started bringing it up in conversations, now that I have scared my kids and hunnie with the thought of impending heart attack. Second thought I smile a really big smile when I imagine my daughter (motivated by the thought of losing her mom) getting up allowing an appropriate amount of time to pull herself together (that will never happen!) wrather than racing out the door at the last minute with half her stuff for the day trailing her and her hair standing on end because she only gave herself 15 minutes to get from a deep sleep to driving down the freeway to work. Jeeze! Maybe that's the real source of the anxiety problem causing my heart flutters. Whew! Sayin' my prayer that she makes it safely even though she claims that there is no evidence of a higher power! God help all of us mothers of adult girl children!!! Did I mention that "I love my family!"?
